I have a dream... But Martin ain't in it...

I recently had the most weridist dream. Unfortunately, it wasnt a lucid dream so that basically means I was along for the ride, still it was a good dream.

Through means that I will never understand, I was granted the knowledge of two things: Unbelievably efficient renewable energy generation and the ability to create a hyperdrive.

Now, your immediate thoughts are probably something like "Oh here we go, another spaceship story"
Well shut up. Because your right. (Stupid foresight)
I had no idea what to do aside from writing it all down on paper, which became a serious problem for my family and close friends because it utterly consumed my time. Apparently I managed to stay in the house for three weeks, refusing to leave my room except for food and hygene requirements. You can imagine what my work boss would have said.

Regardless, one thousand A3 page diagrams later, a sore hand and not enough coke, I completed drawing the plans. Huzzah! Now, obviously, nobody actually believed me that these plans were genuine (Including my family) until I built a scaled down, very busted version of the Energy Particle Generator which basically took the house off the national grid and therefore scaling back our power bill massively.

Now, naturally, news travels and pretty soon I had a reporter show up on the doorstep asking about this near infinite power generator. Well, naturally they were not very impressed at looking at a device that looked like a tin can attached to a wrapping paper tube. Either way, my new invention made headlines... For three days.

All of a sudden, three days later, the suits show up. Oh goody goody, we all know what happens here. They want to trade for the plans or they'll come back later with a gun and a crowbar and a black van. Actually, they had the black van the first time. Kinda werid. I did what happens in all the movies, I said Nooooope. They didn't offer me what I wanted. Did I want money? Suprisingly enough, no I did not want money. Because a measly Subway Giftcard was not enough to satisfy me (But I do like Subway... someone write that down for later)

Actually, what I wanted was a big corporation with lots of excess money to spend FOR me. I'm no economist, that's their job. So apparently I teamed up with some US based firm that was all like "Let's go to the moon!" and I was all like "Haha, let's go to Pluto"

Once I accidentally hyperdrove one of their warehouses into pluto itself, they were sold on the idea. Really hope there was nobody inside that warehouse when it and several chunks of ground went with it...

-----

So, about a month and several million dollars later, a massive underground chamber had been dug in order for construction of the ship to begin. It was built into the side of a mountain, so that the ship could just fly straight out. I thought that was a pretty cool idea at the time.

However, eventually tension built up. The head of the corporation grew sick and tired of the fact that I barely talked to him about the progress when he called and stuff, but this was actually due to the fact I was too busy drawing up plans for the darn thing and it was consuming my day like the previous diagrams had done (Probably more so than before)

In a fit of rage, he kinda told me to stop working on the ship and go and hire a secretary to handle communication. I have no idea what drove me to do so, but I decided to immediately head to the nearest university, sign a deal with a lecturer and take on a class for a day. My plan was to find a secretary from one of these bunch. I ran them through several different tests, each designed to stress them extremely mentally (Not really physically... Though one guy did through a desk through a window and that was funny)

Eventually, after half the class had left after I drained them of their energy, there was one girl who had managed to stay calm the entire time (Can't remember her name though, darn dream memory failures!) and only broke a light sweat (Made sure that happened, just to prove she was human and not some evil android FROM TEH FUTURE!). So she was hired and graduated on the spot and then everything was back on track for the construction.

The process was really simple, she does what I say, doesn't disturb me in my office (I GOTS MY OWN OFFICE IT WAS AWESOME) and also follows me around writing down anything important as I walk about the construction zone; stuff like the hull foreman telling me that "we are out of Tritanium... again!". I have no idea what Tritanium is, but it sounds expensive and important. So my secretary dealt with that.

-----

Pretty soon, the ship looked like this.

Which was kinda the look I was going for. (Oh who am I kidding, I drew up the darn thing on paper! It's exactly how I envisioned it)

So we built it and it was done and then there was a huge congratulations ceremony on it's completion. A hippie tried to assault me saying it was going to blow up the planet but... well... yea, dunno what happened to him.

So we did all the checking systems stuff and then boom, we all died.

Just kidding! Nothing went wrong, we moved forward (The pilot was rather giddy with excitement) and out of the launch bay and up into the stars, a perfect start.

Then I woke up.

Dangit.

Xbox One: The Great Debate

I want to firstly acknowledge one true fact.

I am buying an Xbox One.

Anyone else is free to do what they want.

I felt like writing about the great debate that is supposedly running amok on the internet concerning the Xbox One. I'm actually sick and tired of seeing the number of rants that people are getting up in arms about concerning it.

The most curious factor is the fact that people are idiots - and yes, I did just say that.
When Xbox 360 was about to be released, people said the exact same thing that they do now - that it was a bad idea and that everything about it was bad. And yet, here we are today, it vastly overpowered Playstation 2 and 3 (That's a fact - not an opinion) in terms of sales.

Alot of people mostly brought to attention the 'concern' over it's need to constantly be connected to the internet - and dial home once every 24 hours. The problem is apparently privacy. Honestly, I am avidly certain that every single person who has accessed the internet is liable for criminal charges.

If you don't want to be liable for criminal charges, then you'll not only need to agree but FULLY READ the terms and conditions on EVERY website you EVER visit. And you'll need to re-read them if they ever change.

That means your liable for:
 - Watching movies/TV illegally
 - Downloading movies/TV illegally
 - Downloading games illegally
 - Hacking anything... obviously illegal.

So, yes Jim. I'm looking at you in the back. And you Christie.

Microsoft, however, has come back and removed the constantly connected feature. So be happy.

To be completely honest, with just how much illegal activity is conducted on the internet, I'm actually surprised that governments around the world havent declared a digital form of martal law on the internet.

World, your stupid.

Your really stupid...

The concept of Normality

For the record, "Normality" is a word.

I tend to talk to myself alot when nobody else is around... and quietly when other people are around, and some of the conversations I have had with myself would probably fit on the level of locking me away for a short while.

Actually, I havent seen the list of requirements. The point is, I came up with a rather interesting theory today while walking down to the shops to buy brocolli. Now, as you may or may not know, I really don't like brocolli. So I needed to think about something else to maintain my minimum level of sanity.
"What do we define as normal?

A most curious question, if not completely impossible to give a solid one scentence answer. If you did ask me to do that though, I'd just say No.
I really think the only correct way to define what we consider is normal is to consider what is socially acceptable and what is a social custom. Even if your a person who doesn't agree to either of those terms, chances are you do it.

Why? Because that's what you do. That's normal for you. Face it, we're all normal. Except me. I'm a crazy person remember. I use my keyboard as a guitar.
So, considering the logic of normality, I figured I'd work out some basic things that are considered normal, starting from the plainly obvious working right up to ones that you probably didn't think of.

1. Wearing clothes.
      - Well, that should be obvious. It's normal to wear clothes. It's also logical, they keep you warm and for some people, wearing fashionable clothes is a way of life, it's normal for them.
2. A maintained level of autonomy
     - You could argue over the logic of what we call autonomy as well, but since we are talking about what is normal, let's just both agree that sometimes you do things because it's your job and the alternative is sleeping on the streets. Hooray for capitalism!
 3. Ettiquite
     - Let's face it, there are still some thirty year olds out there who will and WANT to eat everything with their hands, looking in fear upon a knife and fork. But let's face it, everyone draws the line somewhere. That line is what makes you work out what needs a pitchfork to the face, and alternatively a well drawn out document as to WHY you should have a pitchfork to the face but will instead have a knife in the gut.

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But hold on, what if we change something around? What if we introduce something that isn't normal? Of course, in this new world, such a thing would now be considered normal. For the sake of you reading this and me typing it, let's embrace change. (Yeesh!)

What if we, for example, considered carrying firearms normal? Yes, I'm talking about every single person in the world just casually carrying a gun around with them. I think the world would have a very different meaning. Think about it, you would expect anyone who served in Vietnam to walk around with their trusty M4A1. Rich business people would have something shiny like a Desert Eagle in their back pocket.

I'm talking normality here on a level like carrying your wallet/purse around. Chances are you'd come across some dumb blonde girls (As you do in weather torn Auckland City) with a pink or light red coloured gun, attempting to make a fashion statement but really asking for a target to be painted on their back.

If you ask me, there would be two choices of weapons for me. Ironically, neither of them existing yet. Which kinda sucks. If I lived several hundred years in the future, then perhaps. I'd probably walk around with a System 99 Anti-Material on my back, a weapon more than capable of picking off targets a kilometer away and even blowing through thick vehicle armor. In my hand? Probably a M45 Tactical Shotgun.

Why a shotgun? Because I've played Halo, and nothing rips through the Flood (For non-halo fan people, they are basically close to zombies) or the Covenant like an M45 did for me. I like me my weapons.

So, what is normality? Well, from what I remember from writing this, apparently it's got something to do with guns. Except I don't think that the average person carries a gun in their back pocket.
Stupid blondes.