Sunday, December 26, 2010

Starship Awesomeness heading for a far off planet in the Ionian Nebula

In a galaxy so far away it hurts to think about the distance, on a planet slightly larger than our planet Earth, there was a community of human beings (Who cares how they happen to look and talk the same as us) who managed to get along with each other in perfect harmony. It is on this planet that I plan to travel to when our planet explodes after nuclear warfare between America, North Korea, Japan, Vietnam, China, Russia, England, France, Germany, Austrailia, Irag, Afganistan and South Africa.

I'll have a brilliant spaceship that bears a very similiar design to those of the UNSC Frigates, mainly because they look AWESOME.

I'll also have state of the art weaponry and my crew will all wear redshirts. I'll wear a blue uniform. This is because universal laws dictate that people in blue uniforms never die, only the ones wearing red ones, as Star Trek has taught us.

The trip will take approximately one hundred years, but it will only feel like one short sleep because me and the rest of the crew will all have cryopods, as was first brought about in Alien. That was a good movie.

There's going to be a plentiful supply of coke, chocolate and pies on board as food to be eaten. Though, it might not taste too great after being cryogenically frozen for about one hundred years. But, food is food and drink is drink. (There will also be water, but thats beside the point)
I think I might also have a few space nets installed, so I can do some fishing for space fish! (What majestic creatures). I wouldnt be able to cryogenically freeze their dead bodies. The smell alone would kill us. Who cares about salmonella when you can die from overwhelming smells!

As you have read from this post, I obviously have too much time on my hands. Either that, or I dream too much. Possibly both.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Taking a break from it all

Christmas Day. What a great time. Mum wasnt able to get all her christmas shopping done but, meh. I'm just glad that she's here to share it with us. I got an album from Hillsong (Shout To The Lord) and I am listening to it right now. WOOHOO!

I also got a DOUBLE charger unit for my Xbox controllers. THERE YOU GO SARAH AND JACQUES! THEY DO EXIST! MUA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

lol.

I also got the Stronghold Collection on a single DVD. I can't wait to play it... I'm just burning songs right now to my computer. That way, I can listen to the new album while installing the game!

I hope you all have a great christmas this year. Seriously. Have a good one. Otherwise, I'll be FORCED to make SURE that you DO have a happy christmas. =)

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Facebook fails on game security

Sorry, just had to add this little extra fail that I found. I don't actually play restaurant city and I found it on my friends page, but I edited it and now it makes logical sense:

Message: "Philip, I just visited your restaurant and found a locked crate with two ingredients inside!"

Response: "Woopdie doo! Just so you know, that crate was locked for a reason as it was a recent import. I hadn't gotten around to opening it yet. Thank you so much for taking the liberty to go into my storeroom without permission and steal my food. I love you too, [Insert name here]"

Sorry, had to do that... =P

Christmas Spirit... More like a Department Stores need to sell stuff...

It's that time again at the end of the year. Christmas. I think it's a fundamental fact that Christmas has become something much larger than a holiday festive cheer. Indeed, there are probably people out there working for big companies who do nothing for the whole year except plan how their Christmas is going to be better than everyone elses.

The idealogy of Christmas is that everyone can relax with their family, watch each others holiday videos (And usually die while doing so) and basically have fun. Tis' the season of giving, but I've noticed a trend over the years as my maturity increases and the world descends further into chaos.

Westfield Shopping center had it's Christmas decorations already up two months before the festive season. How fantabulous. Not only that, but all the advertisements you see on TV are talking about how THEIR store has the best Christmas bargains and how THEY are the ones to buy from. (Heck, while their at it, why not put in some slander about other shops?)

Then the Christmas wars begin. Department stores hire out santa lookalikes to sit in a chair all day and listen to kids drone on and on about what they want for Christmas. Then their eyes break after the millions of flash enchanced photos that are taken of them and said children. But behind all this joy and happiness, its a total underground war.

To put it metaphorically, or in a way you might find it easier to understand, try to imagine hundreds of santas each shooting at each other with chocolate egg grenades, candycane missiles, poisoned eggnog tipped darts and present bombs. The war is massive. Only in reality, its the big department in legal battles over whether or not Christmas wrapping should be legal (If at all controlled)

I've always enjoyed Christmas. I know one or two (Or five) people whom dont enjoy it, but that doesnt stop me from sending them a present filled with lots of good stuff. Typically, they open it BEFORE christmas day, but who cares? It's all one big happy time.

If you really want some fun, spike the eggnog, give it to your uncle, have a camera on hand and watch and record the ensuing chaos. Alternatively do something ORIGINAL for Christmas. Maybe make a sleigh, attach it to the top of a car, and go for a rally around town. First person to the highway wins, assuming they havent been cut into two by overhanging electrical wires.

Or, get a bunch of nerf guns and wage a real war. Going to the park? Bah, go to a stadium.

If your gonna do something for Christmas, do something original. Maybe dress up as an UNDEAD mall santa. That would be original. Sure, you'd scare the kids, but maybe that would stop them from asking for a LCD TV, a playstation 3, an Xbox 360, a Nintento Wii, a new Windows 7 computer (Apple SUX) as well as a bountiful amount of chocolate.

Enjoy your Christmas, don't get drunk, stay indoors, don't watch holiday videos and most of all: VOUCHERS ARE THE WORST CHRISTMAS PRESENTS OF ALL TIME.

P.S: I said 'Christmas' 13 times. Including this time.

Happy holidays everyone. =)

Sunday, December 19, 2010

This begun with a sentence

Ironically, that title has a double meaning. Why? Well, people kept telling me that I should start a blog because apparently I can talk about anything here without worry about what people might think about me. I know for a fact that on twitter, 99% of people become followers of other people just so they can gain followers, but they never read anyone elses tweets. As a result, everyone is posting about their own lives on there, but nobody cares.

Secondly? Well, the title is a sentence, and "Ironically, that title has a double meaning." is a sentence as well. So, logically, that means thats its ironic. Why is it ironic? BECAUSE I SAID IT IS. ^_^

Anyway, I figured I might as well start with a long explanation as to what everything on this blog of raging insanity and a side of explosions is going to talk 'bout. Technically, anything and everything. Heck, I might even write essays on why a chicken burger tastes good because its made at KFC. Or I might talk about how all my friends have lives and I'm stuck here writing this post. Technically, thats already true because they do and I'm doing this. (LOL)

Regardless, I've always taken a keen interest into blogs, the whole concept behind how they work and why nobody ever mentions why the cake is a lie (It is totally a lie.... Play Portal and you'll understand...)

Not only is the cake a lie, but its mandatory for it to be a lie. In theory, it means that any cake that you have never existed in the first place, it was simply there to create a slight balance in your life and give you a small amount of joy from eating it. That is, assuming that you liked the 'taste'. As a result, this basically means that nobody has ever really created a real cake since the release of Portal, as all cakes thereafter became a lie.

Except Chocolate Fudge cake. Anyone who sez thats a lie is morbidly insane. Be worried.

Anyway, this is me, signing off for the first time for a short while. I have no idea how few and far between these posts will be, but I can guarrentee that they are gonna be completely unrelated to anything you have previously experienced. (Unless you know me as well as you think you do. Trust me, this blog is taking raging insanity to new levels...)